Fake Intoxication

This write-up is a true hidden gem I re-discovered and it made me so nostalgic! Have you creatively gotten yourself out of situations that need you to overeat and/or drink when you just didn't feel up to it?

Too often, during counselling sessions, people discuss how keeping up with a meal routine on ‘normal days’ is no bother. However, the trouble arises during social gatherings they “just can’t get out of” a.k.a. 4-hour dinners (buffets) with extended family, acquaintances, colleagues and in-laws (for some reason, the latter one must especially NEVER say no to).

These are situations which invite force-feeding and worse, forced drinking. Being on the doing and receiving end of this act are both health behaviours which are problematic on many levels. I will save my rant as to why this is the case for a different article. As of now, sharing a hilarious client narrative which discusses an experience of how he got out of said forced drinking situation. He still works at the same place and thus, has requested anonymity lest his boss find out.

“Extreme excitement about an employment that at best can be described as a ‘glorified trader’s desktop job’ is one of the typical traits that my banker boss is apt at exhibiting. An integral expression of this excitement is by celebrating even the smallest of successes. One such Friday, my boss asked me to accompany him for a quick drink (refusing was not exactly an option in view of the appraisal period approaching).

So there we were, 3 of us (one more colleague got cornered into it), at a bar listening to the usual market gyaan and some self-praise. Before we knew, he was 2 pegs down. Neither did I feel up to breaking my new-found disciplined, healthy lifestyle (was surprised at this myself a bit) and nor could I have said no to my boss. Thus, pouring the drinks into the huge planter next to my seat was the best possible middle ground I could come up with in that situation.

I thereby managed to extricate myself by just having 1 drink as opposed to 3-4 which I would have had typically. I bet that the particular planter must have outgrown it’s pot much faster with all the alcohol. I quickly managed to fake intoxication and escape the situation and while I would have never even dreamed of doing something similar when it came to food, I was proud of myself and the way I handled the situation.”

Disclaimer: We are not trying to promote wastage of food or beverages. The only cliché learning we are trying to drive home is the fact that where there is a will, there most certainly is a way.

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